Saturday, November 28, 2015

she waited

The tree farm was only 20 minutes away, and still, he asked.
"Are we almost there???"

Her brother would be out in 25 minutes, but still she pleaded.
"Can you please take me home and come back for him?"

They rise up at dawn and immediately head to a button to push...a TV a game pad an ipod.
Eyes barely open.
They rush into the day.

And yet, she waited.
She was told, "Do Not Be Afraid."
She was to become the Mother of God.
With barely a warning.
With no directions.
With no time frame.
With nothing to distract her while she waited.
With His will only.
She waited.

I have become increasingly aware of what an impatient world we are.
We do not like to wait for anything.
We are inconvenienced by waiting.
We like to be busy.
We like to complain about being busy.
We really have trouble waiting for we fear what we are not doing while we wait.
Waiting often feels like nothing is happening.
And yet ironically, constantly doing really seems to get us nowhere.

She waited.
She didn't busy herself.
She pondered.
She prayed.
And look at the fruit of her patience.

From the outside, she looked like she was doing nothing.
From the outside, she looked ordinary.
And I think we have trouble with that, for ourselves.
We need to look extraordinary.
We need to show people what we are doing.
We need to post every move we make.

Waiting, a holy expectancy, is not the same as putting off, however.
The bills I stuffed in the drawer?
Those I have been putting off.
That hard conversation?
That I am putting off.
The something tugging on my heart asking me to sit in silence and be with Him?
That I am putting off.

And for what?
I think I can say that putting things off only add to the daily anxiety.

But holy waiting?
Sitting in silence and just being?
This always bring peace.

I have been putting off Adoration this weekend as to get there, I must use a busy intersection that no doubt, will be delayed by Christmas sale seekers.
I do not want to wait.
And the more I ponder Mary, and her waiting to bring Christ into this world, the more I think that perhaps waiting to come face to face with Christ is not such a bad thing after all.
Perhaps, there is great purpose to that waiting and delay?

Tonight at the 5:30 Mass we will light the first Advent candle.
The light that pierces through the darkness of each of us is coming.
But we have to wait.
And He is worth the wait.
Don't you think?

I pray this Advent that we are each filled with the desire to wait, and the hope of our Savior to come.
I pray we sit peacefully in the nothingness that waiting can often feel like.
Because something IS happening.
Ready or not.
Here He comes.

Mary, teach us how to wait.